Change You Can Xerox: The 2008 Presidential Primaries!

I’ve always been kind of politically apathetic. There are issues that concern me and stances that I would like taken, but living as I do in Texas, and my political leanings being as they are, and the candidates that are selected for us to choose from, I never really gave politics much thought. “What’s the point anyway?” I thought. This is a sentiment I’m sure is shared by many people my age, people out of college and thrust into the real world who rather than face reality with a smile on their face retreat into depression and apathy and episodes of Gossip Girl (seriously, why is that show a hit? I blame my age group).

But like those same apathetic lost sheep, I’ve changed my tune this political season. I’ve suddenly come to the conclusion that, you know, things are kinda going south right now. Not just for the rest of the world, they’ve always been screwed up. I’m talking specifically about America. I don’t know if it’s because I’m older, or things really have just gotten that bad, but everyone just seems so damn miserable all the time. And I don’t think I really need to list out any reasons why people are miserable as that would just make you more miserable than you already are. Point is, things suck right now and for once I’m going to lay my cynicism and distrust of the government aside and believe that change is possible.

As someone who leans Democratic (more on that in a sec), I think it’s awesome that we have the two candidates that we have now. Two people who have inspired someone as apathetic as me to really care about the direction our country is taking and believe that maybe they can do something right for a change.

And of course they are pissing it all away. Thus far, Hillary Clinton has been my man but the longer this thing drags out, the harder it’s going to be come November for someone not named John McCain to enter the White House.

People have asked me why I even picked Hilary in the first place instead of joining the First Church of Obama with everyone else. Well, like anything else in my life, it was determined by a quiz I took online (for the record, living your life in this manner is not the best way to get things done). I really wanted to research ALL the candidates before I made my choice, so I had to know exactly what my political leanings were in the first place. I’ve always thought of myself as extremely liberal when it comes to social issues and fairly moderate on the economic side of things.

But as it turns out I’m a borderline socialist, pretty much the opposite of moderate. This came as a surprise to me as I usually consider socialists to be A) Swedish or B) pinko Commie nutcases or C) hipster douchebags. When I really sat down to think about my political leanings, I came to the conclusion that maybe a little government involvement in the economy ain’t such a bad thing. Deep down, it would be great if there were no government and people helped each other and puppies frolicked and all that stuff. And I think conservative ideals towards the economy are really great in theory: it’s my money, I should do what I want with it, leave me alone. But if you think that, then why have a government in the first place? If we’re going to go through all the trouble of setting this thing up, then I believe that the government should provide for the people and help them achieve the best life possible. Even if that means higher taxes or government involvement. On social issues, I did about what I expected. No matter what economic plan they offer, I will probably never vote for a Republican based on the party’s stance on certain social issues.

So anyway, now that you’ve stopped reading, I chose Hilary mainly for four reasons. One, she seemed to conform with my new political awakening. Two, I decided health care was the major issue this time (if we’re going to fix one thing, let’s make it that) and her plan is the one that really stands out and she has fought this battle before. Three, the test told me I should vote for her. And four, every time I see a picture of her from behind and I see that all those campaign trail doughnuts have cascaded to her thighs, I feel so, so, so sorry for her.

And this is not to say that I don’t like Barack Obama. I like him a lot, in fact. He says things that no other politician would dare say. That thing about people clinging to God and their guns? Genius. And as I touched on earlier, I almost kinda wish he would just go ahead and win to get the thing over with. Because the Democratic party is tearing itself apart right now when what we really need is cohesiveness. It would kill me if this election is lost before it has even begun because we could not stop fighting ourselves.

But in closing let me say this. Both of these candidates have campaigned on messages of hope and change and electrified the electorate (that’s a cool phrase) unlike anyone I can remember (and I really only remember Bill Clinton, Bob Dole, Bush, Kerry, and Al Gore, so make of that what you will). And one of them damn well better deliver on some of their promises. Because if I get this fired up, and they get into office, and things don’t change or get worse, then I’m done. I’m through. My heart will be broken and I will never care about anything again as far as politics are concerned. Now, if you’ll excuse me, Gossip Girl is on.

So that was my first serious post. Anyway, this made me laugh for like five minutes…

Less than a week in and I’m already talking politics and posting funny pictures of cats. Is this a mothafuckin blog or what?!?